primarycaregiver2022

  It is hard to explain what it is like to be responsible for everything to keep our frail elders as well as can be expected. There are no hard and fast rules about what is the next right thing to do. There is a constant internal dialogue about what to do next, what is needed next, what is necessary, what is over doing it, what is intrusive, what is respectful, what is dignified, what is an emergency, what is normal, what does it mean to allow 'nature to take its course'.  The question that surfaces every moment that my attention is not occupied elsewhere is, "Did I do enough? Is there something I need to do now?" It is the enormity of the responsibility, many, many days, carried out alone or in isolation.  Other family members are traveling, working, socializing, crafting - occupied with their own pursuits and concerns. They are not thinking about what did Mom eat today? Does she need to toilet? Is she lonely or enjoying her solitude? Is she bored or enjoying the qui...